I relaunched my blogging presence a little over a week ago and I'm already feeling that lull I experience that usually leads to blog? what blog? oh, that thing! I think the challenge I'm facing is that I don't have an identity as a blogger. I don't really know what I want my blog to offer others. This next sentence may be selfish, and potentially something I shouldn't voice here, but I don't think this is meant to be for others - but, more so for me.
Thinking back on the reason I decided I wanted to blog again, it came when I had the ephiphany that I wasn't the woman I saw myself being at this age. This isn't related to reaching career goals or living in a particular city - those things I accomplished. It was more about the basics of being a woman. I'm not the cook my mother is, I don't possess that feminine charm to change the energy of a room, I couldn't honestly say I know how to "take care of a man," I'm not crafty in the Martha Stewart sense of the word, I don't know how to remove really bad dirt stains from a white tiled floor...I feel when it comes to those aspects of being a woman, I'm not there.
This portrait of being a woman might ruffle a few feathers, especially for my fellow professionally driven "modern" women. But, these are the skills I want to be able to say I possess as a woman. It's kind of hard in this society to justify this frame of thinking - especially living in NYC. The city where gender roles are constantly being challenged and women are being encouraged to do more, be more and I love that. But, I've been so focused on becoming this modern woman - one of intellect, ambition and independence, that I lost focus of the values of the traditional woman.
I created this blog and my 101 list around becoming the woman I want be - one that finds balance between modern feminist values and the traditional standards of womanhood. The result: pretty, smart.
As a fellow New Yorker, let me just tell you that the wonderful thing about being a feminist is that you can CHOOSE what kind of identity you have/want and no one can tell you it's stupid. Someone told me that once when I knew I wanted kids more than anything else, and it is very true. The feminist movement exists to set us free, not to make us feel like we have to carry around yet another new set of "rules."
ReplyDeleteThat's a good way to look at it. Thanks for commenting
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